School Is Over
Hello readers of my blog. Warning: make sure you have a tissue box near you before you start reading this. It might make you cry. At least, I sure did while writing it.
Last Thursday I had a 15 minute lesson with my piano teacher for my last class of college, Non-Major Piano Lessons. And then just like that, after those 15 minutes ended, I was done with college. Last Monday I had done the last of my homework and I was so anxious for this last class time to be done. Couldn't it be sooner in the week?? I would think to myself. I've already done everything else! Just this one little thing between me and my degree!
On Wednesday night I reminded myself that the next day I would have a 15 minute lesson and be done with school!! I was so excited! But only a little while later I was in my room trying to figure out my post college life like I've been trying to do all summer. I was looking at my hand held calendar and once again saw my note about my short lesson for the next day. I got excited again! Then suddenly a huge wave of sadness came over me and I started crying as a thought came to me, I'm not going to school in the fall…
On the one hand, I've been excited all this time to get done with school and no longer have to deal with the homework that teachers give me. There's also the fact that it's been weird responding to people who ask me, "What are your plans now that you're graduated?"
What they didn't know was the fact that I still had 6 credits to complete for the summer. I had the option to be a part of the Commencement Ceremony since it was just those extra 6 credits, but I hadn't officially graduated yet! So as the end of the summer semester approached, I was really looking forward to actually being a graduate.
On the other hand, however, there are so many wonderful things I'll be missing out on by not going back to college for this coming fall semester. Sure, it's been hard. There have been many experiences of stress as I've tried to get homework done on time, get to classes on time, and many other personal things that have made college life a burden and frustration.
But I have also made so many friends through both my peers and my teachers. I'm going to miss sitting on chairs or even on the floors of the hallways of the music building and saying hello to all the wonderful people who walk by. I'm going to miss all the friends I've made, including those whom I've only just made in the past few semesters. I'm sad that I didn't get to spend more time with them. I’m going to miss the music building itself, my second home. That’s why I feel so at home and comfortable with sitting on the floors!
I don't live far from the university that I've been going to, and I'm definitely going to go back many times for school concerts so that I can continue to see my music buddies. I’ve even gotten the contact information from all of these friends. But now that I don't have school, I don't have much of a reason to go out of my town. And you know…those darn gas prices… 😑 I know that I have new adventures waiting for me up ahead, but it just feels like graduating means that I’m not going back at all and so I feel a little empty.
Last Monday wasn't the first time that I got excited about graduating, and Wednesday night wasn't the first time that I felt sad about that very same thing. I know that Wednesday's experience won't be the last time I'll get sad over thinking about my graduation. Tears have flooded my eyes even as I wrote these words! These emotions of completing my degree has helped me realize that I have so many memories that I don't want to forget.
I originally planned on just using this blog for backstories on how I ended up writing my songs and maybe even some behind the scenes of putting together my videos. But now I feel that I should add the stories and fond memories of my time as a musician at college, along with stuff that I learned. I'm not a music teacher and I didn't go into Music Education, but as a songwriter I am such a Music Theory nerd!!! I am totally willing to share my theory thoughts even if I'm not a perfect teacher. Overall, there are just so many experiences that I've had over the past four years that I don't want to forget! Maybe you'll read my blogs, maybe I'll have no readers. All that matters to me right now is that I have these memories set in stone so that I can look back on them.
Speaking of my blogs and on a less emotional topic, I have decided on a time for posting my blogs. I have decided to put up one blog a day for the second full week of the Month from Monday to Friday. For example, today is the second Monday of August and I will post four more blogs until this Friday. It may seem like a weird time to be putting up blogs. But since I am also writing sheet music for my songs and making YouTube videos, I am choosing to focus on only doing one week of blogging per month. I have already been consistently uploading YouTube videos on the last weekend of each month, and I need a small break from the fight with technology(I may be doing all this online stuff, but I'm a musician not a computer genius). So I'll be taking a break from uploading stuff on the first week of each month and then focus on my blogs on the second week.
Thanks for reading until the end and I hope that as you read this blog you didn't get as teary eyed as I did while writing it.
